


5 times harley couldn't catch anything and 1 time peter couldn't

by GreenPencil



Series: cas has a birthday, we're so glad!! [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: 5 + 1, Big Brother Harley Keener, I love my boys, M/M, Non-Binary Abbie Keener, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, The Wrenchident, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Worried Tony Stark, harley cannot catch i tell you, peter parker is not helping, theres literally no angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-07-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:02:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25303483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenPencil/pseuds/GreenPencil
Summary: Harley Keener could catch once. That went out the window when he hit a growth spurt and suddenly had these long limbs he had no control over. Catching things was not his forte.or: harley cant catch and peter cant either
Relationships: Harley Keener/Peter Parker
Series: cas has a birthday, we're so glad!! [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1832926
Comments: 18
Kudos: 93





	5 times harley couldn't catch anything and 1 time peter couldn't

**Author's Note:**

  * For [censored](https://archiveofourown.org/users/censored/gifts).



> first of all: happy birthday cee cee!!!! i love you so, so much and hope this is at least decent. i really hope you enjoy it. you have been so kind and i love you so much. youre one of the best moms someone couldve asked for. i hope this makes your birthday even a little better. thank you for being there for me when i need you <3
> 
> second of all: thanks to the discord server for suggesting that harley cant catch!!! i totally stole your ideas and wrote them (oops) but i hope yall enjoy too. 
> 
> third of all: thank you to my twin for reading this and telling me that the plus one doesnt count as not catching- just kidding, thank you for looking over and offering me a few ideas of what harley cant catch and hopefully not exposing which one of these is actually just me that i projected onto harley
> 
> fourth of all: i looked over it but that was before i changed abbies pronouns so all mistakes are mine and seriously, try to guess which thing i couldnt catch. im a disaster. 
> 
> without further ado, enjoy!!!

1\. water bottle 

Harley was good at catching things once. Then he hit a growth spurt somewhere between seventh grade and high school and all of that went out the door. He had these lanky limbs that he couldn’t control and as a result, he quit baseball, which he had been doing for years at that point. He was never exactly sporty but after that he wasn’t able to catch for the life of him.

He was up one day for school, groggy and definitely not a morning person, unlike his sibling and mom. He loved both of them dearly but he wished they could just keep it down, for crying out loud. 

Eventually he got up, unable to fall back asleep with Abbie’s quips making their mom, Macy, laugh like there was no tomorrow. He came into the kitchen where they were eating. A plate was resting at his seat, a small portion of scrambled eggs and a piece of buttered toast waiting there.

“Oh, there he is!” Macy called, throwing a grin at him as he scowled at her and sat down at his plate, “I thought you might want some breakfast.”

He made a sound of acknowledgment, still working to get the sleep out of his eyes. He could use it. He was a constantly growing boy, after all. 

Abbie got up to put their plates in the dishwasher, shooting him a teasing look of their own, “Slow down or you’ll choke yourself.” 

“Pass me a water bottle please,” He said after swallowing, looking over to the younger Keener expectantly. 

They rolled their eyes and then seemed to get an idea, going over to the fridge to pull out one of their plastic water bottles. Abbie turned to Harley with their eyes gleaming. “Catch,” They told him and tossed the water bottle. 

He fumbled, reaching out to try and catch it and scowling at Abbie when it bounced away from his hand to fall onto the floor. He leaned off of his chair to try and pick it up, letting out a sound of surprise when he tumbled off it.

Macy, to her credit, seemed to try to be keeping her laughter in. Abbie was not, their own shrieks of giggles loud as they watched him pick up the water bottle and quickly climb to his feet. 

“Stop laughing!” He told them, to which they just laughed harder at. He rolled his eyes and went to sit back in his chair, unscrewing the water bottle and taking a gulp from it before going back to his breakfast. 

“Long limbs, long limbs, long limbs,” Abbie quipped at him, blowing a kiss when he shot them another displeased look. “Right, well, I gotta get to school. You better hurry or you’ll be late.” They told Harley, going out to the hall. A few moments later he heard the door open and slam. He shoved the last bite of toast into his mouth, making out an unintelligible sound that was supposed to be ‘goodbye, Mom!’ but was more like ‘mrumph, muhem’. 

2\. baseball

Harley couldn’t catch but for Abbie, who kept pestering him into playing with them, he would try. So there they were, Harley with a glove on one hand and Abbie with one on their own. They’d been tossing back and forth for a while, Harley leaping to the side to try and catch and sometimes being successful. He was better at throwing it back over to Abbie, though, who was catching just about every ball thrown their way, much to Harley’s dismay.

It was a warm Saturday and so Harley’s hand was sweating within the glove, tank top clinging to him and shorts loose on his figure. He had tried to talk Abbie into something different because he didn’t want to make a fool of himself but eventually he gave in.

He held up his finger, keeping them from throwing it back. They rolled their eyes and waited, bringing a hand to their hip and tapping their foot impatiently. He tugged off his glove, jogging over to drop it under a tree before jogging back.

Abbie held it up, brows raised, “You ready, slowpoke?” Despite the name-calling, it was obvious in their tone and motions that they cared for him and loved him. Abbie and Harley had a good relationship, sticking together and supporting the other through crushes, bullying and whatever other problems they had, no matter how extreme or insignificant. 

“Yup!” He called, holding his hands up to catch. Abbie tossed it and Harley lurched to the side, moving to grab it. It rammed into his pinky and he let out a surprised yelp of pain, bringing his hand back and shooting Abbie a startled look. They looked amused but concerned, darting over to him to make sure he was okay.

“Abbie, oh my god,” He was trembling with laughter despite the pain in his pinky. He tried to bend it, wincing at the ache there. “I think you fractured my pinky.” He looked up at them, an amused look on their face even as they went pale.

“Oh my gosh,  _ Harley _ ! This isn’t funny, are you okay?” They frowned at him, eyes dancing with concern. 

“Well I mean, my pinky really hurts but otherwise I’m okay,” He told them, watching as they seemed to calm down from the reassurance of him being able to joke and make quips still. 

Abbie shook their head, “You need to drink more milk but I’m gonna go get Mom if you seriously think you broke your finger.” They told him, arms crossing over their chest as they cocked their hip out. Sassy kid.

“ _ You _ broke my finger,” He told them, watching as they gave him a look of disbelief for a moment. 

Abbie uncrossed their arms and stuck their thumb over their shoulder, “Right, well, I guess I’m gonna go and get Mom then. You stay here. I’ll bring you some ice or something.”

Harley did as they said, watching them dart off into the house. He ran his uninjured hand over his face, a disbelieving grin on his face. What a story to tell, assuming he really did break his finger trying to catch a baseball. He was sure if he told it he’d have to tell it while Abbie was there so they could defend their honor, but it’d be an absolutely wild story nonetheless. A short one, sure, but how many people could say they broke their finger trying to  _ catch _ something?

Macy came out a while later and she fretted over him until Abbie pushed her into getting it checked out so they all three went to the ER to get his finger checked out.

It  _ was _ broken and when Abbie heard that, they apologized before cracking up into laughter. 

He couldn’t help but join them.

  
  
  


3\. blanket

Tony Stark was not as impressive as one would think. At least he wasn’t in Harley’s opinion. Although he guessed that meeting someone and then talking them down from a panic attack less than 24 hours later makes someone seem less intimidating than if Harley had only seen the “where’s my tuna sandwich”, all-attitude, cocky Tony Stark. 

Either way, knowing the man was a big honor or something like that. He got to meet the Avengers, which was pretty cool. 

What was not pretty cool was that he made a fool of himself in front of the Avengers the first time he met them. 

It was a summer after Spider-Man videos had started popping up on YouTube when he went to spend the week with Tony. His mom had finally agreed and been able to afford a train ticket for him - she wouldn’t accept anything from Tony. She was a fiercely independent woman and Harley both respected and resented it - and so Harley met the Avengers. 

He guessed they didn’t know who Spider-Man was or wanted to keep it under wraps or something because he - assuming Spider-Man was okay with he/him pronouns. Harley could understand vibing with they/them pronouns sometimes and still wanting to be considered a boy - wasn’t there at the Tower. 

Harley would be grateful for this later, but he didn’t know that yet of course.

Anyway, the week had been going well. Tony suggested an Avengers Movie Night because that was apparently a thing they did. Harley was down for it. 

He found himself a spot on the couch as everyone else started filing in. “Oh, hey, Tony, pass me a blanket?” He asked, noting the older man was the only one still standing and that he was next to the blanket basket. 

When Harley said pass, he meant have the blanket handed to him. Tony obviously did not understand that because with a dramatic eye roll and a ‘what am I, your manservant?’, the blanket was being flung at Harley. 

He startled, reaching up to grab it and instead hitting Sam as the blanket missed his arms by a long shot and smacked straight into his face. 

There was a moment where Harley took the blanket down that the Avengers were looking at him like ‘how did you miss that so badly’ that had Harley embarrassed but also reminded vaguely of Abbie back at home and her reaction. Then Tony started laughing and some other Avengers joined in, further reminding Harley of Abbie. 

“Oh my god, Harley,” Tony wheezed, watching the boy in question, “That was such a big target and you managed to not only miss it but to-“ He cut himself off with a cackle. 

Harley didn’t find it particularly funny but apparently everyone else found it amusing whenever he couldn’t catch something and managed to make a fool out of himself. 

He just couldn’t catch a break. Except, oh wait, he’d tried to catch something and instead broke his finger so he guessed he  _ could _ catch a break but literally nothing else. Unless Sam’s face counted. Speaking of, Harley figured he needed to apologize. “Hey, Sam, dude, I’m sorry. I promise I didn’t mean to.”

He found Sam not cackling like Tony, although there was definitely amusement in his eyes as he waved the apology away. “You’re fine, Keener, don’t worry.” 

“Right, well, with that out of the way, can we please start the movie?” Harley asked. 

Tony have him a wicked grin even as he moved to sit down in his own spot, “You just want the attention off your inability to catch. It’s okay, nobody’s laughing at you.”

“Anymore.” His voice was a grumble and Tony clearly chose to ignore it.

“FRI, start whatever movie Clint has chosen ahead of time.” 

Ratatouille started playing on the screen and although there were some groans towards Clint, everyone was quickly sucked into the movie and the attention was taken off of Harley’s inability to catch. 

  
  
  


4\. peter

Harley and Peter had been dating for a while and so Harley assumed Peter knew of Harley’s terrible inability to catch anything and everything. 

Apparently, Harley realized, he did not. 

Peter was crawling along the ceiling as one does when they have spider powers and are in a safe environment to show them. 

Harley had walked in and Peter spotted him, scurrying across the ceiling over to him. It’d been disconcerting at first to see Peter so clearly defy gravity all by himself but by this point Harley was used to it. 

What he was not used to and not expecting was Peter to grin down at him and tell him to: “Catch me, Harls.” 

Harley could hold Peter just fine. The boy weighed next to nothing, thanks to the spider bite and hollow bones or something else. Peter could hold Harley just fine, thanks to incredible spider strength. So catching Peter from where he dropped directly above Harley should not have been a problem, right? 

Wrong. 

“Wait, Peter, no-” Harley protested, being cut off by Peter unsticking himself and dropping. 

Harley tried, he really did, honestly. He held out his arms to try and catch his smaller, light-as-a-feather boyfriend and he failed. His arms were held out too far apart, curse the long limbs, and Peter bumped into one arm but otherwise fell right through, ending up startled on the floor. 

“Wow, okay, I was not expecting that,” He admitted, blinking up at Harley with a shaken expression.

Harley offered out his hand hastily, “Yeah, no, I’m so sorry. I can’t catch anything, actually, and, uh.” 

“Evidently not,” Peter quipped, taking Harley’s hand to be pulled to his feet and giving him a thoughtful look.

“Why are you looking at me like that? You’re making me nervous, darlin’,” Harley asked. He wasn’t really shaken by the intense look but he did feel self-conscious. 

“FRIDAY,” Peter began, “Create a folder called ‘Harley Cannot Catch’ and add this and any other footage you have of Harley failing to catch anything to the folder.”

“Oh my god, Peter.” The other boy just gave him a devious grin.

“Right away, sir.” FRIDAY responded, and was it just Harley, or did she sound amused? “Adding 157 videos to the folder.”

Peter gave him another look, mouth falling open and a hint of a giggle escaping, “One hundred fifty seven? Already? Harley, oh my god, how-” He cut himself off with another restrained chuckle, eyes doing nothing to hide the amusement there.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” He grumbled, “I’m going down to the lab.” 

He turned and left a giggling Peter there, asking FRIDAY to send him the videos. 

  
  
  


5\. wrench

There were a lot of videos on that stupid folder by the time of the Wrenchident. Because they couldn’t just call it the Wrench Incident, of course not. By a lot, it meant all the Avengers knew about the folder and were constantly adding videos. Harley didn’t even want to know the actual number. 

The Wrenchident - Harley really hated that name, who came up with it, anyway? - happened in the lab, because that’s where wrenches were most commonly along with Peter and Tony and Harley. They all spent quite some time of their days down there. 

Tony was used to working with Peter, he understood that. He worked with Tony, too, but he’d had to go back to Rose Hill to take care of a few things, tie up loose ends and all that. So Tony was readjusting to him and his inability to catch things.

It made sense that he would forget Harley couldn’t catch and throw a wrench. Unfortunately for Harley, it went soaring and hit him smack in the forehead. Down went the cowboy. 

Peter glanced over at the sound of a thud, eyes going wide. He scurried over, “Harley?” He was worried, of course he was, his boyfriend had just been hit in the head with a wrench. 

Tony seemed to put together what had just happened and he jumped up, too, “Oh my god, Harley I’m so sorry.” 

“I hate you. I hate both of you so much.” Harley grumbled, bringing up a hand to rub at his head.

Upon receiving confirmation that Harley was somewhat okay, Peter turned his face to the ceiling, “FRI, add that to the Harley Can’t Catch folder, please.”

Harley had learned by now not to argue FRIDAY adding something to the folder so he just sighed in defeat, settling back in as Tony looked him over, fussing and fritting about. “I’m gonna take you to the med bay, yeah? Okay, yeah.” Tony scooped up the lanky boy in his arms, grumbling about his back but mostly worrying about his pseudo-son as the other cackled. 

Harley shot Peter a lopsided grin, “Yeah, laugh all you want, I bet it’s funny. I’ll be the one laughing when you get injured, then.” 

“Harley, I’m really sorry I’m laughing and I’m sorry you’re hurt, but I just- It was a wrench and you- Oh my god, Harley,” Peter was wheezing, seemingly barely able to string together a sentence. If he thought too hard on what had happened, he’d start laughing harder. 

Harley rolled his eyes, “Take me away, Man of Iron.” 

Harley went down to the med bay. Harley got better. The Avengers started making jokes about it and teasing him. Sometimes one of them would ask for FRIDAY to play the folder of all his misfortune on movie night instead of an actual movie. 

He did not get better at catching and the folder did not stop growing in size. It was a mess but Harley found himself fond, if not exasperated and annoyed, by the whole thing. It was just one of those things, he guessed. He couldn’t change it and honestly, he wasn’t sure he wanted to try.

  
  
  


+1. colored pencil

Peter Parker figured Spidey Senses would have helped him to catch things. They did, most of the time. They were useful for dodging a bullet or catching a wrench Tony threw at him. 

Sometimes, though, they found the most absurd things dangerous and so Peter caught himself yelling at May to watch out when a mosquito buzzed in and towards them. He sniped it really well with the web, thanks to the Spidey Senses, but May would not stop teasing him about it for months following the event. 

It only made sense that Peter’s senses would find a green colored pencil a danger to rival a knife when the colored pencil came towards him with the pointy side facing him, of course.

“Hey Peter, catch,” Cindy had told him before tossing the pencil. 

He glanced over, Spidey Senses spiking and he was instantly more alert, webshooters out and him hitting the pencil to the wall swiftly. He recovered and stared at the pencil. “Um. I, uh. It’s not what it looks like?’ He tried, voice squeaky and coming out more like a question. He was  _ really _ bad at this secret identity thing and apparently Harley found it to be the funniest thing in the world.

Peter shot him a look, like ‘help me please’ and Sally rolled her eyes. “Calm down, Peter, you’re just lucky Mr Harrington took Flash out into the hall to talk to him. I’m pretty sure everyone else here has known for, like, months at this point.” She looked around, getting nods and sounds of agreement. 

“H-How?” His voice still held that crazy, worried tone and he was bouncing with nervous energy. He sounded really shocked by this revelation. 

“You’re not exactly subtle, you know. Your excuses are really lame and you’re not exactly the best at keeping secrets,” Betty told him, their face skeptical. “Plus, we’re at Midtown for a reason. We’re smart kids. Except for Flash, I guess, although he probably knows and just doesn’t want to accept it.” 

That elicited a few chuckles, the rest of the AcaDec team going around to explain their reasoning, Abe going so far as to say he saw the one time that Peter managed to stick his hand to the desk at the beginning of the whole Spidey situation when he still had trouble controlling his stickiness. 

Peter was thoroughly embarrassed, if not impressed and kind of surprised he hadn’t realized that of  _ course _ they would know. He was pretty sure the conversation could’ve gone on but then the doorknob turned and Peter vaulted over the desks to yank the green pencil off the wall, turning to Mr Harrington as he walked in, looking exasperated, followed by a very peeved looking Flash. 

Peter shot looks around him to see everyone else back at work like nothing had happened. How was it that he, the worst secret keeper, was Spider-Man? He didn’t know, but there were definitely more Spidey Sense shenanigans to be had. 

(And there were. And Harley had FRIDAY make a folder for the ones that happened at the Tower.)

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to leave comments or kudos if you enjoyed!!! i thrive off of feedback 
> 
> thank you for reading :)
> 
> join the parkner discord (its great there i promise): https://discord.gg/B2K9ggq


End file.
